SHIVA RUDRA BALAYOGI

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Developing self-integrity to grow spiritually – online Q&A, No.115

Recorded on 20 October 2022 with Malaysian participants

0:00 Intro
0:32 What is self-integrity in spirituality?
4:32 How do we develop and sustain self-integrity?
8:20 What are the characteristics of a person with self-integrity?
12:37 Is having integrity only a virtue or does working on oneself to achieve integrity get converted to sadhana?
15:07 If one practices meditation sincerely, do good virtues increase, and is this a sign that one is progressing spiritually?
17:29 In this life is self-integrity the only way to grow spiritually to realise the ultimate truth?
21:45 How to insure we have self-integrity in difficult situations?
26:49 How would a person with strong negative mental habits attempt to cultivate self-integrity?
28:53 Babaji’s closing words

Developing self-integrity to grow spiritually | Thus Spake Babaji – online Q&A, No.115

Recorded on 20 October 2022 with Malaysian participants.

Question: Thank you, Babaji. Our question and answer topic for today is ‘Developing self-integrity to grow spiritually – How do we achieve it?’ The first question we have, what is self-integrity Babaji? And what does integrity or self-integrity mean in spirituality?

Babaji: In a simple way to understand, when you want to achieve something and progress, you need to be sincere to yourself. That is the spiritual integrity. Like you should be genuine that you want spiritual progress, you want to be a matured personality in this world. You should be able to apply proper wisdom, and always try to see a larger cause. Welfare of the whole universe, whole world and many people, not simply selfish and narrow-minded. Here, selfish and narrow-minded means when we would have imagined about our body as myself and just bother whatever needs to this body, any enjoyment, any happiness, anything we want to own and just don’t bother about anybody else. That is selfish, narrow-mindedness. You need to overcome this so that you can try to see yourself as the immortal or eternal entity that is all pervaded. The day you realize, you will realize the same Self is everywhere. That is the self- integrity also and be sincere, then only when you listen to the master’s upadesha, teachings and when you have to do the sadhana, when you do the sadhana, you should have understood what the master has taught you, and what is the technique that he has given you. That should have penetrated your inner layers of the mind and sincerely you adopt that technique, and sincerely sit every day to do sadhana. So these are all the integrity, whether in spirituality or in any field, an integrity is needed. If the student itself is not genuine and sincere, then such a student would not pursue, would not listen to the master’s teachings, they will be asking easy questions, like some people ask, “Can I lie down and meditate?” When the master teaches, you sit down in any comfortable posture. So much of leisure is given. You can sit in any comfortable posture. Just keep the back and neck straight and then close the eyes –  giving the technique. But again they come back and ask, “Can I do it in a shavasana? Can I do it when lying down?” Virtually they would like to sleep and not do any sadhana at all. So earlier sometimes I used to be bit lenient, but now I have become very strict. “No, that is prohibited. You cannot lie down and meditate. You should not. You must sit down and meditate. Otherwise you can fall asleep”. So like these are all the basic points of integrity and sincerity, what it means. You have to be sincere to yourself because the master has achieved. Even if you tell lies and if you are not sincere to the master, it doesn’t make any difference to the master. Master is in the Self, but it is you who matter here. Your integrity matters for yourself.

Question: Thank you Babaji. Following from this the next question, how do we develop and sustain self- integrity Babaji?

Babaji: See, when we want anything, always try to go for the highest. Like I have always told, in this world everybody knowingly or unknowingly are looking for happiness. Peace and happiness. So this is important, and then you must try to have the highest peace and happiness. Why to compromise for a smaller peace? Like as a child I used to think, “Why is that happiness is not there all the time? It must be there 24 hours, 12 months. There must not be any fluctuation. Why sometimes an unknown fear or unknown stress happens, sometimes it is exciting. Is there something wrong in me, something wrong in the world?” Like that I used to think. Like that sincerely, one should think, that is the first point of the integrity. Sincere; this wisdom must be applied and then go for, go to the knowers of the truth. Like Sri Krishna telling Arjuna, this is the next point of integrity, “Before death shall claim thee Arjuna, go to the knowers of the truth and sitting at their lotus feet, seeking their permission, ask such intelligent, good questions. And when the master teaches, adopt such methods sincerely, and every day without fail do the sadhana and achieve the truth to yourself. This is the purushaat word used in ancient scriptures, means with a self-effort you have to achieve. Mind is yours. So that is how your integrity is very important. This is how you build up and develop and cultivate, sustain yourself with integrity. Like Swamiji taught, “Do or die, never give up sadhana”. And set the target that you want to know yourself. I must know myself,  that is the target, like that you set and develop such integrity, that is how you will sustain.

Then, you see, when you look for a master also, if you are sincere, you want only real peace and self-realization or want to know yourself, then you won’t compromise for any small or other teacher, the teachers might offer anything, “Oh you are already realized, you just pay me for a 50,000 rupees.” So that is not sincere teacher at all. So this is what it is, you have to do. I have always told if anybody tells, “I will do it for you, don’t worry, you will get realized”, do not believe any such teachers. The one who says you have to sit and you have to do it because it is your mind, that is the sincerity and you will not compromise. Many people wanting an easy thing, they are ready to believe anything because they want it easy, “Oh the master will give it to us, just put his hand and give me self-realization like an instant coffee” – things does not happen like that,  nobody has given, nothing has happened in the world. So that is the integrity that you need to sustain yourself and develop, cultivate in yourself.

Question: Babaji relates integrity with sincerity. What are the other characteristics of a person with self-integrity, Babaji?

Babaji: Every question almost I am talking about the same thing, many times people have asked me the question, “How to find a genuine right Guru?” I tell them first, you need to be genuine, you need to be sincere. You need to think that you want only that Self, you want to know about yourself, you want to become aware of yourself. This is sincerity, this is how the character of a person who seeks spirituality will be. All those people who seek miraculously that the Guru will touch and give me realization, “Something happened, I don’t have to do anything” – they are all not sincere at all, they don’t have self-integrity at all, they are all like thieves for themselves. I don’t mean hurting anybody, it is only for educational purpose that I am talking all these things. So if a person is a thief, then he won’t do any sadhana, he won’t learn properly, he won’t pay attention to the master’s teaching at all.

Clearly, transparently, we keep telling, “This is what you have to do, you sit down, you close the eyes, you just watch.” Swamiji used to tell, “Everyday when I initiate people, it is like a command. A soldier, when the commander commands, the soldier does it simply, he won’t think. Like that if anybody can do it”, Swamiji used to say, “the samadhi will very easily come.” So when I tell, “You have to do this, just watch means watch and don’t do anything else”, then mind will become quiet and the samadhi will come. So these are the characteristics of a person of spiritual integrity. He will be sincere, he will listen to the master and he will sincerely sit for sadhana and do it, then only one can achieve. The master initiated hundreds and thousands and millions of people. One or two, they achieve. Because master taught us sincerity, we sat sincerely, we did everything that the master said, then only we could achieve. If that sincerity was not there, we couldn’t have achieved. So know that these are the characteristics. A person will listen to the master, will pay apt attention, that’s what the master demands – pay apt attention when I am talking.

Even in Kathopanishad also, the Nachiketa story if you remember, finally Yama says after luring him, “You go back to earth for thousands of years”, but Nachiketa insists, “Is there anything for me to make me not to come back to you”. He says, Yama says, “No, you have to come back. No matter 5,000 or 50,000, one day the body has to die and you have to come back to me”. “Then give the knowledge here and now itself”. Then the first condition Yama says, “One time I will narrate, I will give upadesha, and you must pay apt attention, must not repeat any question also”. That was the strongest condition of the ancient Gurus. One time only they used to recite and you must listen. If you have not listened, you have wasted your time. That is what is self- integrity – cultivating is all very, very important. That would be the characteristic of a person. He will pay apt attention when the master is teaching. So clearly and simple way, hundreds of times we tell about brain, about mind, then people misunderstand mind for the brain, brain for the mind. So that means they haven’t paid apt attention. That is sincerity.

Question: Thank you, Babaji. The next question. Babaji, is having integrity only a virtue, or does it get converted as sadhana if one is working on oneself to achieve integrity.

Babaji: Integrity is definitely needed to achieve in the sadhana because if there is no integrity, there is no sincerity, then you won’t be doing sincere sadhana at all. You will keep sleeping, you will get up and you will see here and there, you will get up, take a break and go, come back, take a break and go, come back, take a break. In 15 minutes time you will take 15 times of break. What sadhana you will do? What type of sadhana you will do? So that is important. So first you need to have the integrity, that sincerity, then only you can do sadhana. After sadhana you achieve the result. The integrity has to be before. To do the sadhana you need to have the integrity, you need to be sincere – that is important. That must not be doubtful. So that is important. Before sadhana your sincerity is very important, then only you will do sadhana. After sadhana you should be achieving. When you have sincerity then only you are doing sadhana you must know also. Otherwise you won’t do sadhana properly. If at all you sit for forty years closing the eyes and don’t watch and don’t keep quiet mentally, you haven’t achieved any silence of the mind and you have not understood what the master says, what was the Master’s upadesha. That means you did not have sincerity, means your integrity was doubtful, that is why the results are not coming. That’s why the Self-realization has not happened. Also remember, Swamiji always told, “Those who can find their own faults can become great people always.” That is very important. We can find others faults easily but to know our own fault is the integrity – important.

Question: Thank you Babaji. The next question. If the person is doing sadhana and meditation sincerely, does this imply that virtues such as honesty, morality, integrity also increase in the person by their own accord. And can this be used as a parameter to gauge if one is actually progressing in meditation Babaji?

Babaji: Yeah definitely. To begin with, if you’re sincere, honest and integrity is there then you will begin sincerely. As you go on doing sincere sadhana, that enhances because mind gets purified, all mind’s corruption gets removed. Corrupted mind which is against sincerity, all such things will be removed. Mind becomes totally purified and regains the form of pure Consciousness, then the integrity increases to one’s own Self. That’s what is the sincerity, honesty, everything happens. Then such a person will realize all the mistakes that one could be doing. Then realizes, “Oh, it was me who was not keeping quiet. It was me who was not at peace. I need to be peaceful then I have the peace. Why should I complain to anybody else? Why should I complain about God or the world or anything? The world is in itself, in its place, God is in itself and why should I complain God is not giving me peace, God is not giving me peace. I am not peaceful. That is why I don’t have peace. So we will realize our own mistake and we will become quiet. If we become quiet, we are at peace. So this realization also occurs. All our faults will be rectified. In fact, we meditate so that we can rectify all our previous faults. Sometimes jokingly I l tell, “One day when you realize it will be just like you have come out of the mental asylum of your own imaginations.”

Question: Our next question Babaji, the only thing we have is this life. Everything else is imagination. When there is no right and wrong, is self- integrity the only way to grow spiritually, to attain or to realize the ultimate truth Babaji?

Babaji: Yeah, definitely. You see, this life is an opportunity. It means we have obtained a physical body which has a well-developed brain. With the help of the brain only we can know right and wrong, real and unreal, permanent and impermanent. About this world, first thing we need to understand, it is impermanent. Whether in illusion, whether it is there or not nobody knows. It is there, it appears, but what everybody knows, it is impermanent. Today one matter has one shape and its shape may change. Today this body is full and sitting and alive, life species type. It is talking to you all. Tomorrow it may be simply mingling with the earth, one with the earth, or if it is put to funeral cremation it will become a little bit of ashes and some bones. Like that everything’s shape changes. Today the earth is there, it may go for a billion years and it may come to an end tomorrow. Nobody knows. Sun will also come to an end one day. That’s what Saint Kabira tells, “Maree He dharati Akasham, Marie He surej, Marie He Chanda”. Means everybody will die one day. All the fourteen worlds’ Lord will also have to die if it has appeared as a human form – like that he talks. That is the truth. When we know this truth, this is once in a life cycle opportunity. Sincerely we must do sadhana, then we can achieve that spiritual truth of Self-realization. Means “Who I am, how do I exist as the eternal entity beyond the birth of physical body and physical body’s death, how do I exist?”

Like as a child of ten to twelve years, I used to be worrying. “If at all I am that Aatman as the scriptures say, why is that I am not aware of that? Consciously aware.” Now you see, if you have a name and you are consciously aware with this body, if I call your name then you will realize, “Babaji’s calling me”. But do you know who really you are? So that is what is important. “So if I am that Aatman, I am not this body, why is that I am not aware of it? What has prevented me from knowing this?” Like that I used to wonder, which led us towards the spirituality and to know the truth so importantly. So that is what is important – once in a life cycle of opportunity. Once this body goes, you lose control over yourself, where you are going to be born, what is going to happen, what is not going to happen, nobody knows. Nobody has come back to tell, “I died and I became this in the next life. Now I have come back to this previous life.” That doesn’t happen, previous life you won’t come back. So all those people who are dearer to us who are dead, they have gone and they have not come back to ask about us whether we are happy or not happy. So that’s what it is. That is the truth, this truth we must accept, understand. That is why Krishna tells “Before death shall claim thee, before the death will claim this physical body Arjuna”, there is once in a life cycle opportunity. We must take out time, slowly, slowly practice, practice and increase so that we can know about ourselves. We can regain consciousness about our real Self, what we are, how do we exist.

Question: Thank you Babaji. Babaji sometimes when we are in a really difficult situation, we are unable to think calmly and tend to make unwise choices. How do we ensure we have self- integrity in those situations Babaji?

Babaji: That is the most important thing. If you are doing spiritual sadhana regularly and always you understand that you need to be sincere. Sincere means if there was anything that happens in life, we were taught since childhood, our teachers used to tell in school, first try to know where you are at fault. Rectify that one. If you are not able to achieve proper marks in the examination, try to know where you are wrong. Try to rectify that, prepare yourself better for the next time. Don’t give up. Integrity also is like that. If we are confused, we have lost temper and we do mistakes, then we should also think, “Why is this happening, why this anger and why am I committing mistakes again and again? Let me not. Let me think properly where am I wrong. Oh, I don’t have patience. That is the first wrong thing. I need to have patience and composure. Then I can think properly.” When you are composed, when you think properly, then you will know what you are supposed to do, where you are wrong, you rectify yourself, you work out strategy, like that. So many people we call them as geniuses in different fields. Somewhere they would have practised composure and peace, they would have realized  to think properly, work out a strategy. Coolly they have to think. If they lose temper and they will be confused, they will go on doing mistakes. So that’s what – in a rush. They think, they take time, think properly, do it, what you are supposed to do. So, “I have not been meditating properly” – realize that one. Many people try to put the blame on the Guru itself. “Guru, it’s not coming, Swamiji, it is not coming. Babaji, meditation is not coming, I am sitting every day.” But simply sitting is not the thing. Are you able to keep the mind quiet? Are you able to keep the mind focused? Are you able to just watch and don’t think anything else? Did you understand when I have instructed to you hundreds of times you have sat for meditation? Have you all understood when I instruct? Just keep quiet, just keep watching means mentally you keep quiet, just watch. I have also told microphone holding, when I ask you to watch this hand, don’t think whether this is a hand, Babaji’s or whose hand. Just watch on this, use this figure to focus, practice focus. That’s why I have told, all visions that might occur in the meditation, anything that comes, use it to focus. Don’t bother what it is, whether it is God or not God, whether it is good or bad. Don’t bother just for a while – during meditation at least.

See when you went to school, at that time it was necessary to remain focused in the school. At that time you couldn’t afford what was happening in the world, what was happening on the streets, then you wouldn’t have studied properly. That is what I am trying to tell, I am not telling not to bother about the world, you can bother. But when you are meditating, try to become mature, increase your capacity. Then when you go to the world, you can behave properly, you can behave like a mature person, you can sort out your problems, you will attend, you will fight for it. So that is important, Swamiji said, “Do or die”. Like the soldier knows when he goes to battlefield, “Either I will do it or I will die.” Both are equally acceptable. Always in life, after we put in proper efforts, even if it doesn’t happen, when we die we will be satisfied, “At least I put an effort. I tried my best.” In spite of that if it didn’t happen, leave it to the nature. If you could not change some person, we tried our best as a Guru, we tried to teach that person sincerity, honesty, everything, be sincere to yourself. Still they didn’t change themselves. No problem, I have tried my best. When I die I will have the satisfaction. As long as this body was alive, I tried to teach sincerely to everybody who came into the Zoom classes, who came in front of me, who asked me a question, I tried to answer sincerely. That is sincerity. That is integrity.

Question: Thank you Babaji. I have a last question here. Babaji, how would a person with strong negative mental habits or tendencies attempt to cultivate self or spiritual integrity as he would not be able to recognize the wisdom of it?

Babaji: Willpower is necessary, that we want to progress, and one should realize he or she is very negative in my mental thinking. If a person wants to change himself or herself, it is possible. But often people become victim of their own ego. They don’t want to change themselves, they start thinking, they always assume whatever they are that is the right thing. If they are negative also, they think they are right, they will never accept; “I am right, I did not do any such things.” So when they argue, you cannot help, no God can help such people. So this is important, never try to argue with a master – with an expert, master means, expert in that field. Any field you want to go, anywhere. You want to do a business, you want to get any job, any expertise anywhere, always receive advice, teachings from the experts in that field. You want to be a good doctor, you must study well and then get trained under an expert, sincere doctor, that is also important. So if you are not ready to get trained, if you don’t want to learn anything, then no God can help you. You will remain a condemned person like that only all the time, negativity, useless things, trying to be cunning and shrewd, then somewhere your own karmas will hit back to you and you will become a victim of your own disintegrity.

Wonderful, if you do not have any other question, remember what the answers are I told today, soon probably they will put it on YouTube also. Listen one time, hundred times you listen. I have always encouraged, even if you had asked the question, you want to ask the same question if you have not understood, ask again, don’t feel shy. I don’t lose temper, I am happy to answer again and again so that it can penetrate the inner layers of your mind. Otherwise you won’t remember. From outside if you simply listen to the answers you would have forgotten by the time you switch off this zoom and go and have a cup of coffee. By then you would have forgotten what Babaji did tell. “Did Babaji tell this manifestation or technology, I could not understand”. No problem if you have not understood, ask again, again ask next time again ask, do not feel shy. Swamiji has told, “Ignorance is not a curse, ego is the curse”. If you don’t want to learn that is the curse on you, you must learn. I also learnt and I continue learning even now also, from somewhere, from somebody, from something Swamiji keeps teaching me. I don’t hesitate to learn anything that is good, that is useful. Always learn, learn and learn, then you can become Self-Realized.  You must be sincere about integrity, I hope you all have understood, listened to my answers. You have to be sincere to do sadhana, to achieve Self-realization -that is very very important!  You be sincere to yourself, I am not important, your faith is important, your faith in the Guru, and your integrity is the most important thing for you. We were like that, that is why we could achieve. Swamiji was sincere. When Jangama Sage came and made him to sit for Tapas, then he did not give up. I have told, after three months, it was such a rainy season, he was sitting on the ground, his flesh was getting decayed, skin all getting decayed, rodent, scorpions were biting him, it was becoming difficult to keep the mind in samadhi. Then he got up one day, started crying.  He was a young boy of fourteen year old, wanted to go home, “Let me go home and work and do some business.  Why should I be sitting in the graveyard like a dead man, I did not ask anybody.  I don’t know who is this Jangama Sage who came and made me to sit”.  When he started getting out at the gate, he saw the Jangama Sage was standing there again, he asked “Go and sit back, you have to sit for twelve years, that is in your prarabdha, in your destiny, that is why I have come manifested in front of you. I will not allow you to go back until twelve years”. Then Swamiji, determined, came back. “If that is the case, okay, for twelve years I will sit down. Only death can stop me from putting an effort like this. If I die I am not responsible, if I don’t die I will keep doing it twelve years, I won’t go home at all, finish”.  He forgot about the home, forgot about the world, everything.  His only job was to just keep watching. Swamiji used to tell, “Jangama Sage asked me to keep watching, I just went on watching and the samadhi occurred.  So simple”, he used to tell, because he was sincere. Innocent child he was, born in a village.  He never doubted anything.  The master wanted him to watch and he went on watching.  He achieved samadhi.  He achieved Nirvikalpa samadhi. I appreciate deeply all your participation, and it is time to say bye bye to you all.  All my love and blessings to you all, may Swamiji bless you all. We are always with you.

And two more pages, let me just quickly go. To all of you.  Good, good, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. Keep meditating every day, until I come on the Zoom next week also.  Do not let go the time and don’t tell me “I could not meditate Swamiji, I had to attend the relatives’ weddings, I had to attend a movie, I had to attend this”, don’t tell excuses.  Sit and do sincerely, be sincere to yourself. All my love and blessings, time to disappear. Bye bye!

End of Session

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